Joke of the day

Grandma is Eighty eight years old and still drives her own car. She writes:
Dear Grand daughter,
The other day I went to our local Christian book store and saw a " Honk if you love Jesus " bumper sticker..
I was feeling particularly sassy that day because I had just come from a thrilling choir performance, followed by a
thunderous prayer meeting.

So, I bought the sticker and put it on my bumper.
Boy, am I glad I did; what an uplifting experience that followed.
I was stopped at a red light at a busy intersection, just lost in thought about the Lord and how good he is, and I didn't
notice the light had changed.
It is a good thing someone else loves Jesus because if he hadn't honked, I'd never have noticed.
I found lots of people love Jesus !
While I was sitting there, the guy behind started honking like crazy, and then leaned out of his window and screamed,
' For the love of God ! Go! Go! Go! Jesus Christ, Go ! "
What an exuberant cheerleader he was for Jesus!
Everyone started honking !

I just leaned out of my window and started waving and smiling at all those loving people.
I even honked my horn a few times to share the love!
There must have been a man from Florida back there because I heard him yelling something about a sunny beach.
I saw another guy waving in a funny way with only his middle finger stuck in the air.
I asked my young teenage grandson in the back seat what that meant.
He said it was probably a Hawaiian good luck sign or something.
Well, I have never met anyone from Hawaii, so I leaned out of the window and gave him the good luck sign right back.
My grandson burst out laughing.
Why even he was enjoying this religious experience !!

A couple of the people were so caught up in the joy of the moment that they got out of their cars and started walking
towards me.
I bet they wanted to pray or ask what church I attended, but this is when I noticed the light had changed.
So grinning, I waved at all my brothers and sisters, and drove on through the intersection.
I noticed that I was the only car that got through the intersection before the light changed again and felt kind of sad that I had to leave
them after all the love we had shared.
So I slowed down, leaned out the window and gave them all the Hawaiian good luck sign one last time as I drove away.
Praise the Lord for such wonderful folks !!

Will write again soon,

Love, Grandma
 
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The Western Wall.

A female CNN Journalist heard about a very old Jewish man who had been going to the Western Wall to pray, twice a day, every day, for a long, long time.
So she went to check it out. She went to the Western Wall and there he was, slowly walking up to the holy site.
She watches him pray and after about 45 minutes, when he turned to leave, using a cane and moving very slowly, she approached him for an interview.

" Pardon me Sir, I'm Rebecca Smith from CNN, what's your name ? "
"Morris Feinburg," he replied.
" Sir, how long have you been coming to the Western Wall and praying ? "
" For about 60 years "
" 60 years ! That's amazing ! what do you pray for ? "
" I pray for peace between the Christians, Jews and the Muslims "
" I pray for all the wars and hatred to stop "
" I pray for all our children to grow up safely as responsible adults and to love their fellow man"
" I pray that politicians tell us the truth and put the interests of the people ahead of their own interests "
And finally " I pray that everyone will be happy "
" How do you feel after doing this for 60 years ? "
" Like I'm talking to a f-----g Brick wall "
 
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I picked up a hitchhiker today. Seemed like a nice guy.

After a few miles, he asked me why I wasn't afraid that he might be a serial killer?

I told him the odds of two serial killers being in the same car were extremely unlikely ;)
 
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Therapist: Your wife says you never buy her flowers. Is that true?

Husband: To be honest...I never knew she sold flowers o_O
 
From interior to exterior to high performance - everything you need for your Stinger awaits you...
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Plane with 5 passengers on board, Donald Trump, Boris Johnson, Angela Merkel, The Pope and a ten year old school boy.
The plane is about to crash and there are only 4 parachutes.
Trump said " I need one. I'm the smartest man in the USA and am needed to sort out the problems of the world !", takes one and jumps.
Boris said " I'm needed to sort out Britain " he takes one and jumps.
The Pope said " I need one as the world needs the Catholic Church " he takes one and jumps.
Angela said to the ten year old :" you can have the last parachute. Iv'e lived my life, yours is only starting "
The ten year old replied " Don't worry, there are 2 parachutes left, the smartest man in the USA took my school bag ".
 
From interior to exterior to high performance - everything you need for your Stinger awaits you...
Kia Stinger
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