MerlintheMad
10000 Posts Club!
@AngryVirginian: You have to know this joke. But others won't have heard it yet.
Muhammad (blessed be his name forever) was visited by Gabriel, taught the true religion, and promised 72 virgins in heaven as his reward for preaching Islam to his people.
When Muhammad died he saw himself in a glorious realm, with an open archway in a wall of billowing clouds. He stood, anticipating the arrival of his promised brides. The first person to enter through the archway was a strange man in foreign garb, with tightly curled white hair and a slightly powdered face. This man advanced on Muhammad in evident anger, eyes blazing, and without a word he beat the daylights out of the Prophet! Then the angry person stomped away, over the celestial horizon and disappeared.
"Dear God! What was that all about!?" exclaimed the astonished Prophet. No sooner had he collected himself than the archway was graced with another visitant: yet another very upset man of middle years, in every whit the same in clothing, hair and anger. This person rushed to lay hands on Muhammad and trounced him as thoroughly as the first. When he was quite exercised enough, the second man stomped off in the wake of the first and disappeared.
Before he could speak, Muhammad was set upon by a third angry man, in visage and apparel like his predecessors. Quite beside himself after this third assault, Muhammad tried to run. But more angry men then poured through the archway, surrounded the Prophet and beat him almost senseless. When the mob was through with him, they departed.
"Dear Allah! Why have I been so harshly dealt with?" Muhammad cried. Gabriel appeared, looking quite fatherly and asked what the trouble was.
"You promised me 72 virgins as my heavenly reward!" protested Muhammad.
"Oh!, I see what the problem is. You misunderstood what I said," explained Gabriel. "I said that for doing what I instructed, you would receive 72 angry Virginians."
Muhammad (blessed be his name forever) was visited by Gabriel, taught the true religion, and promised 72 virgins in heaven as his reward for preaching Islam to his people.
When Muhammad died he saw himself in a glorious realm, with an open archway in a wall of billowing clouds. He stood, anticipating the arrival of his promised brides. The first person to enter through the archway was a strange man in foreign garb, with tightly curled white hair and a slightly powdered face. This man advanced on Muhammad in evident anger, eyes blazing, and without a word he beat the daylights out of the Prophet! Then the angry person stomped away, over the celestial horizon and disappeared.
"Dear God! What was that all about!?" exclaimed the astonished Prophet. No sooner had he collected himself than the archway was graced with another visitant: yet another very upset man of middle years, in every whit the same in clothing, hair and anger. This person rushed to lay hands on Muhammad and trounced him as thoroughly as the first. When he was quite exercised enough, the second man stomped off in the wake of the first and disappeared.
Before he could speak, Muhammad was set upon by a third angry man, in visage and apparel like his predecessors. Quite beside himself after this third assault, Muhammad tried to run. But more angry men then poured through the archway, surrounded the Prophet and beat him almost senseless. When the mob was through with him, they departed.
"Dear Allah! Why have I been so harshly dealt with?" Muhammad cried. Gabriel appeared, looking quite fatherly and asked what the trouble was.
"You promised me 72 virgins as my heavenly reward!" protested Muhammad.
"Oh!, I see what the problem is. You misunderstood what I said," explained Gabriel. "I said that for doing what I instructed, you would receive 72 angry Virginians."
