"Kia's big-power sedan-hatch lacks the emotional punch to stimulate the professionally opinionated, but does its job without complaining."
Your jaded world view is showing. A few people who have experienced many cars might say as much. It seems to me that too many car reviewers are like movie reviewers: looking for something less than enthusiastic or complementary to say: as if doing so makes them out to be not wise enough to the ways of the world.
"Certainly, the Stinger will never be a tool dedicated to driving pleasure, ..."
WTH is he talking about?
"And the more we drive the Stinger, the more we like its mix of utility, style, and, well, the fact that it easily hits 60 mph in less than five seconds."
Confusion! Just say/admit it: a KIA gives you pleasure. Under five seconds to sixty is the same in any car. It is a pleasure to win those on ramp duels. Why can't he just say it?
"Not a single person is polarized by this car. It stirs almost nothing from anyone."
What planet is he speaking from? He sounds like a couple of people around here. Talk about superlative lingo! Who is he talking about? Not any of the thousands of enthusiasts on this forum; a goodly number of whom already own higher end cars or have left one of them to get into the Stinger.
"But most editors just piled on the miles without feeling compelled to say anything at all."
Yes, the Stinger left them speechless.
If Josh is the author of the two earlier assessments, he sounds schizoid.